we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
