Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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