I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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