I skipped work to stalk him.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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