Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Help. Why am I so naked?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
