Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
