He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
