Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
