Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
why do cheetos always look like penises
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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