Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
