I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
