Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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