Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
