singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
