I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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