we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
