"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize