she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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