Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
