if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
It's never too late to be topless.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
