you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
