I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
