some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
How many fucks given?
0.12846
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
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