watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
The power of my boobs compel you
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
