It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I can't turn off my feet"
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
