How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
