Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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