I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I stole a fireplace last night.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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