on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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