That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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