he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
