You were right. It hurts to walk today.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
