So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
