It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
