it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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