sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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