she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Let the clothes fall where they may.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
