I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
