Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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