why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I enjoy the company of your penis
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
