She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just gift wrapped bread.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
