Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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