i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Enjoy the penises
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
