clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
