i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
