Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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