are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
She is in my trunk
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
