I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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