Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
