She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
This toilet bowl is my home.
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