u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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